When to Skip the Bedtime Story: Rethinking Nighttime Routines
Signs Your Baby Is Overstimulated
Bedtime stories have long been considered a cherished ritual in families around the world. The gentle sound of a parent’s voice, the soft glow of a nightlight, and the magic of a story before sleep—it all feels like the perfect way to end the day.
But what if, for some babies, the beloved bedtime book is actually hurting rather than helping their sleep?
In this article, we’ll explore why bedtime stories might not always be the best fit for every child, when to skip them, and how to create a soothing nighttime routine that truly supports rest.
Why Bedtime Stories Aren’t Always Soothing
Books are wonderful tools for connection, language development, and emotional bonding. For older toddlers and preschoolers, storytime fills their “connection cups,” helps them wind down, and offers a moment of calm togetherness.
However, for younger toddlers and babies, bedtime books can sometimes do the opposite—they can be too stimulating.
If you’re currently trying to move away from a “feed-to-sleep” routine, you might be inserting a book between the feed and putting your baby down. While that sounds ideal in theory, it can backfire if your little one becomes hyper-engaged with the book.
Signs your bedtime book may be delaying sleep:
Your baby seems restless or irritable after reading.
They’re overly alert or excited instead of calm.
It takes longer for them to settle or fall asleep.
Every baby’s temperament plays a role. Some can easily transition from stimulation to sleep, while others need a gentler, quieter wind-down.
When Books Are Too Stimulating
If your baby treats even the simplest board book like a thrilling adventure—pointing at pictures, turning pages, and babbling excitedly, it may be time to rethink bedtime reading.
Try experimenting with when and how you read. Instead of including the book right before bed, move it earlier in your evening routine—perhaps right after bath time, or even during playtime earlier in the day.
Once you transition to the bedroom, keep that space sacred for calming, predictable rituals: a cuddle, a lullaby, a soft “goodnight.”
A soothing bedtime sequence might look like this:
Bath time
Storytime in the living room
Feed or cuddle in the bedroom
Soft song and lights out
This small shift can help your baby associate their sleep environment with relaxation instead of stimulation.
The Case for Connection Books (for Older Toddlers)
Once your child reaches toddlerhood or preschool age, books can once again become a powerful part of bedtime—especially those focused on connection and emotional safety.
Connection-themed stories help children feel loved and secure, especially during transitions like sleeping alone or managing separation anxiety.
Some beautiful bedtime reads include:
More Than by Hayley M. Willis — a heartfelt story about unconditional love and connection.
The Invisible String by Patrice Karst — a comforting reminder that love keeps us connected even when we’re apart.
These books gently reassure children that even when the lights go out, love remains close.
How You Read Matters
The way you read a bedtime story can also make all the difference.
If you’re naturally animated or expressive, try to tone things down at bedtime. Use a slower, softer, more rhythmic voice. Think of it as a lullaby rather than a performance.
Overly dramatic storytelling can excite the nervous system, making it harder for your child to relax. The goal is to create a state of calm and safety—because that’s when the body is ready to sleep.
If the book involves actions or interaction, keep them gentle. Instead of playful tickles or big gestures, opt for soft touches like “kiss your nose” or “hug your teddy.”
Ditch the “Shoulds” in Parenting
Many parents feel guilty if they skip the bedtime story because it’s what they’ve always heard “good parents” do. But here’s the truth: there are no universal shoulds in parenting.
Every child is different. Every family is different.
If you find that skipping the story helps your baby sleep better, that’s perfectly okay. You can always reintroduce books later when your child is ready for them.
There’s plenty of time throughout the day for reading, learning, and connecting. Bedtime doesn’t have to include everything—it just has to work for you.
The Bottom Line
Rethinking your bedtime routine doesn’t mean abandoning connection—it means aligning it with what your child needs most.
If your baby is overstimulated by books, it’s okay to skip the bedtime story. Create calm instead through gentle routines, soft voices, and consistent cues that signal rest.
As your child grows, storytime can once again become a cherished part of winding down—a moment of warmth and love before sleep.
And remember this beautiful reminder:
“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” — Mark Twain
Parenting isn’t about following rules—it’s about finding rhythms that bring peace to both you and your child.
