The Trust Effect: The Missing Piece in Your Parenting Journey

What if I told you that the missing piece in your parenting journey isn’t a new routine, another parenting book, or advice from that Facebook forum you keep scrolling through?

It’s self-trust.

That quiet, inner knowing that you’re doing okay. That your instincts are worth listening to. That you don’t need to parent like anyone else — because your child isn’t like anyone else.

I call it “The Trust Effect.” And it’s the game-changer you didn’t know you needed.

Why Self-Trust Matters More Than You Think

Trusting yourself as a parent doesn’t just make you feel more confident — it transforms the relationship you have with your child.

When you’re anchored in self-trust, you show up with calm, with clarity, and with connection. You stop spiralling every time something doesn’t go to plan. You stop second-guessing your decisions. You create a ripple effect of emotional safety for your little one — and they feel it.

But here’s the thing: self-trust doesn’t magically arrive with your baby. It’s built over time, like a muscle. And most of us don’t realise how underdeveloped that muscle is until we’re knee-deep in the tears, tantrums, and sleep struggles.

I know — because I’ve lived it. And I’ve coached hundreds of parents through it too.

So how do you build this missing piece of the puzzle?

Let’s dive into the four ways to grow your self-trust — and why it’s the most underrated superpower in your parenting toolkit.

Slow Down & Get to Know Your Child

In a world obsessed with doing, producing, and comparing, the first (and most powerful) thing you can do is slow down.

Not to isolate yourself, or to stop living life. But to observe your child. Really see them.

• What makes them light up?

• How do they signal that they need connection?

• What soothes them — and what overstimulates them?

When you create space to tune in, you start to parent from a place of knowing rather than reacting. You begin to see the full human in front of you — not just “a baby” or “a toddler.” And when you feel like you know them, you naturally begin to trust yourself more in how to support them.

Parenting isn’t about rushing back to ‘normal life’ — it’s about creating a new rhythm where everyone can thrive, including you.

Experiment Without the Fear of “Getting it Wrong”

Self-trust doesn’t mean always being right. It means believing you can handle it — even when things don’t go to plan.

So give yourself permission to experiment. To try a different nap routine. To respond to a tantrum in a new way. To listen to your gut over the noise of the internet.

And when you try something that feels aligned to you and your child? Pay attention to the outcome. What worked? What didn’t? What felt right?

Then — and this is the important part — celebrate the effort. Not just the result.

Every time you act on your intuition, you strengthen that trust muscle. That’s your couch-to-5K moment. You’re showing yourself (and your child) that you’ve got this.

Get the Right Kind of Validation

We all seek reassurance — especially when we’re doing something as emotionally charged and vulnerable as parenting. That’s normal.

But where you seek that validation matters.

If you're constantly turning to Google, forums, or social media for answers, you’ll likely find contradictory advice that makes you feel even more confused. The scroll spiral is real — and it’s a fast track to self-doubt.

Instead, seek validation from trusted sources:

• A supportive friend or partner

• A professional or mentor who aligns with your values

• A community that lifts you up rather than makes you question everything

You deserve support that empowers your instincts, not silences them.

Understand Child Development — Especially the Emotional Kind

One of the most powerful ways to build self-trust is to understand what’s actually normal.

So many parents spiral into doubt because they misinterpret developmentally appropriate behaviour as something that’s “wrong.”

• Your toddler throws themselves on the floor because they don’t yet have the words to say, “I wanted the red cup, not the blue one.”

• Your baby cries to express all feelings — not just hunger or discomfort.

• Your child pushes boundaries because they’re learning where those boundaries are.

This is not manipulation. It’s growth.

When you understand the emotional and developmental stages of your child, you stop reacting in fear. You start responding with empathy, with grace, and with perspective.

You stop asking, “What’s wrong with them?” and start asking, “What are they telling me?”

The Ripple Effect of Trust

Here’s the beautiful truth: when you trust yourself, your child trusts you.

They feel your calm. They feel your steadiness. And in that space, they feel safe enough to explore the world, express their emotions, and grow into their own confidence.

Self-trust isn't about getting it right every time. It's about believing that you can handle what comes next — even if you don’t have all the answers.

Because the answers come with time. And love. And practice.

And if you’re still in the thick of anxiety, second-guessing, or overwhelm — especially around sleep — that’s okay too. It just means this is the work. This is the moment to lean in and grow your self-trust.

Let’s Grow It Together

You were never meant to do this alone.

That’s why I created the Thriving Together Membership — a space where you can build your parenting confidence with community, coaching, and practical tools. It’s $27 a month and launches before the end of April 2025.

Or if you’re ready for deeper support, explore my Sleep Godmother Program — three weeks of one-on-one support designed to help you and your baby thrive.

Parenting isn’t a performance. It’s a relationship.
And the foundation of that relationship?

Trust.

You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be present.
Trust yourself.
Your child already does.